My last hope of getting cast in a play this year was dashed at an open audition call with the Ottawa Little Theatre last Sunday afternoon. The audition call was for a production of The Miser by Moliere. I gave two cold readings in two different scenes just to be interrupted by the director with a curt "thank you," midway into each reading. Fair enough, this is the reality of open audition calls. I showed up at the audition brimming with confidence, only to have my hopes dashed summarily. I just smiled and left the stage. People of my generation were taught to lose gracefully. We learned growing up that you do not always win or get what you want. Failure is a part of living, an unhappy fact of life. However, despite what I was taught as a child, winning is everything. You realize this is true so well when you lose a job competition. If you are unemployed, losing a job comepetition can mean you are facing destitution. If you are employed it can mean being passed over for promotion, which may not be as bad as having no job at all, but still is a pretty hard knock. How well you play the game matters little when you have destitution staring you in the face.

I will rebuild my confidence and go on to the next audition, whenever that may be. I auditioned a number of times this past year and was cast in only one production. However, I was told the directors who called me back to say they could not use me that I had given a good audition, and invited to audition for future productions, which is nice to hear. I will continue to turn out for auditions in 2008 and hope for the best.